Posted by: truthinwords | January 26, 2011

If You….

This is something I wrote a few ago. Posting it here so I don’t lose it. Always good to look back…


If you are the rock and my true foundation,
Then why do I fall to every temptation.
A cute girl walks by, man… I ain’t gonna lie,
Inappropriate thoughts race through my mind.
I catch a whiff of smoke, it ain’t no joke,
I get so weak, when my cravings provoke.
Is this who I am? A weak fragile man?
A small pond in the devil’s right hand?

If you are the Father and I am you child,
Then why does my life feel so bland and mild?
Where’s the excitement God? Where’s the joy,
That I used to feel when I was a spiritual young boy?
What happened to the happiness that my soul once embraced
In the simple fact that I was running the good race?
Where did I falter God? Where did I stumble?
That now my soul is broken, nothing left but crumbles.

If you are my guide, my one guiding light,
Then why do earthly goods seem so bright?
Power and the glory, money and the fame,
Consumes my mind like a kid a candy cane.
Financial stability has become my priority,
That even on Sundays I pass the bag empty handedly.
I fear that my soul will be consumed by my greed,
That I’ll die a rich man, spiritually in need.

If God created Eve to be Adam’s significant other,
Why don’t You have any love for this lonely brother.
I’m not asking for a girl, a girlfriend or wife,
Just another human being with whom I can share life.
I mean, I pretend to be strong, I deny all my wrongs,
In hopes of covering up pain I’ve held on so long.
I don’t want to look back on my life and one day realize,
I was walking this life alone, me, myself, and I.

I know what you’re gonna say, that Jesus is the way,
I’ve known that fact ever since my fifth birthday.
Don’t feed me Christianese on how to heal the pain,
I’ve known that shit it’s all stored up in the brain.
I know what you’re thinking, I just said the word shit,
Are you so caught up you forgot everything I said before it?
This is my expression, this is my release
Of all the frustration that never seem to cease.

So renew my conviction God, give me motivation
To put all these thoughts into some sort of action!
A man’s faith without works is as good as dead,
At least that’s what a wise man once said.
I need a sense of direction Lord, my own personal navigation,
A heavenly GPS to guide me to my life’s mission.
I’m that lost sheep God, that needs to be found.
So break my legs Lord and carry me to safe ground.

I don’t know what I’m getting at, feel like I’m trapped in a cage.
These are some bullshit thoughts I’ve written on this page.
But I pray that it’s real, that some of its true,
That my soul wants to be revived, start off a new.
So I hope you heard this God, but not just the simple words
But the cry of man who’s life’s messed up, disturbed.
So I pray for your hand of truth to set me free,
So that one day I’ll live out the life you have in store for me.

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